Gastroenterology Doctor's Thoughts

This morning I had a visit from the doctor who will eventually end up doing whatever final surgery is done to the "stent" that is in my biliary duct now (from the last hospitalization in Fountain Valley). He told me that he was the one who had ordered the tests this morning and that they are designed specifically to figure out not only what the doctor in Fountain Valley used to unblock the duct, but also, and most importantly....what caused the duct to become blocked.

He discussed what he thought the reasons might be...and his discussion shocked me. He said it was either caused by a gallstone, which I already know not to be the case.... his other explanation for the blockage was that my cancer has metastasized to my liver. These words spilled so easily from his lips. He was matter of fact, to the point, stoic almost. I waited for him to exit my room before I allowed my emotions to escape, and as my tears flowed, I thought of that commercial where the girl says she was informed she had cancer...like it was a grocery list.

I know this doctor is a good doctor, and maybe I make it seem that I can take the information in stride, I know I try to seem knowledgeable and I want them to be honest with me.

I now await the next pain medication shot, to numb the emotions that are so raw at this moment. To go then to get the test so that I know the reason my organs shut down.

Of course, I will report the information back here...so until then!